As of Sunday 8pm, we are all (in NY) under quarantine. All non-essential workers are working from home. Essential places like grocery stores, pharmacies, and liquor stores remain open. As we all sit at home, doing our part to stop the spread of the coronavirus, we are spending more time with significant others and family than previously. But what would it be like if you were quarantined with a Ranger? What would the pros and cons be? Well luckily, we’ve figured it out.
Henrik Lundqvist
Pros: He’s a solid barber, so you can keep that hair of yours in check since all barbershops and salons are closed.
Cons: His pep talks are going to run your shampoo and conditioner budget dry.
Alex Georgiev
Pros: He can help you with all your housework needs, including straightening that kitchen countertop you put in wrong.
Cons: Likely to be traded to another quarantined family at some point.
Igor Shesterkin
Pros: Puppies.
Cons: Will block any attempt at throwing things out.
Jacob Trouba
Pros: Lots of money to spend on those still open liquor stores. Fiance is a health professional, as a just in case.
Cons: Time spent crying about his best friend being traded is likely to get annoying at some point.
Marc Staal
Pros: Snow angels means clean floors.
Cons: Ginger.
Brendan Smith
Pros: Can perform various roles, even without prior training.
Cons: Fights with your family. Will end his quarantine with a broken hand.
Tony DeAngelo
Pros: Will up your social media game.
Cons: Will probably make you want to delete your social media.
Ryan Lindgren
Pros: Older siblings won’t mess with you if he’s in your corner.
Cons: Horrible choice in food.
Adam Fox
Pros: Grew up a Rangers fan. Lots to talk about.
Cons: Bad sports betting advice.
Cavs in 6
— Adam Fox (@foxyclean) June 1, 2017
Artemi Panarin
Pros: Builds birdhouses.
Checking in on Artemi Panarin, birdhouse builder extraordinaire. 🐦
(📸: IG/artemiypanarin) pic.twitter.com/BuB1pQzy9b
— Sportsnet (@Sportsnet) March 16, 2020
Cons: Doesn’t finish any other projects.
https://www.instagram.com/p/B99bfIuJQQ-/
Mika Zibanejad
Pros: Sweet DJ skills for your late night parties.
Cons: Horrible fashion sense.
Chris Kreider
Pros: Can jump out of a pool. There’s no inherent value here, but it’s just damn impressive.
Cons: Will screen your view of the tv with alarming efficiency.
Pavel Buchnevich
Pros: Calm and collected. Never shows emotion. Under appreciated driver of house chores.
Cons: Resting Buch face.
OFFICIAL: #NYR Pavel Buchnevich suffered a broken thumb on Saturday at Columbus and will be sidelined 4-6 weeks. pic.twitter.com/B87WwYawVL
— x – New York Rangers (@NYRangers) November 12, 2018
Ryan Strome
Pros: Lover of good video games.
Cons: Video game addiction. Goodbye bandwidth.
— Ryan Strome (@strome18) March 14, 2020
Jesper Fast
Pros: Jack of all trades.
Cons: Has his own Instagram wedding page.
Kaapo Kakko
Pros: Makes a mean cuppo cocoa.
Cons: Comes with his own religion, apparently.
Brendan Lemieux
Pros: Has embraced talking like a New Yorker.
Play like a NewYorker. Talk like a NewYorker 😂
— Brendan Lemieux (@blemieux22) February 26, 2020
Cons: He’s probably going to spend most of his time without a shirt.
Filip Chytil
Pros: Doesn’t tweet. You’d be amazed at how big of a pro this is.
Cons: Bound to knock someone in your family over.
a qui la faute sur cette action ou Filip Chytil en plus de marquer rentre en contact avec Tuukka Rask qui subit une commotion cérébrale. Pour moi McAvoy n'est pas sans faute dans le contact, vous en pensez quoi? @NYRangersFR @BostonBruinsFr @increddyble pic.twitter.com/cNtPLiEYMM
— Jeudepuissance (@jeudepuissance) January 20, 2019
Julien Gauthier
Pros: Can reach things on the top shelf. Makes good poutine.
Cons: French accent.
Greg McKegg
Pros: Great name for rhyming games.
Cons: That’s really all he can contribute.
Phil Di Giuseppe
Pros: Probably a good cook.
Cons: Endless sauce vs. gravy discussions.
Biggest news of the day is that the two Italian guys for #NYR have weighed in on the gravy vs. sauce debate 🍝
@TonyDee07 is a gravy guy, while Phil Di Giuseppe is on the sauce train.
Di Giuseppe grew up near Toronto and said he never heard it called gravy until Tony said it.
— Vince Z. Mercogliano (@vzmercogliano) February 26, 2020
David Quinn
Pros: Can motivate you to do anything at the beginning and end of the day.
Cons: Boston accents are worse than French accents. Nowhere to be found in the middle of the day.
Lindy Ruff
Pros: Old man yells at cloud.
Cons: Old man yells at cloud.
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