Musings: What South Park Teaches Us About Angry Analysts & More…October 13, 2011, by
It’s Thursdays folks and you know what that means…it’s Musings day! Chris usually does these, but I think he’s still recovering from his debaucheries in Sweden. Very jealous…
Anyway, I’m trying to figure out an easier-to-read format for these musings, let me know what you think.
Johnny Be Good
If you’re going to tell me that John Tortorella is a bad coach, please come up with a better excuse than “he isn’t giving player X a fair chance.” This isn’t intramurals folks. Playing time is something you earn.
I’ve never been a big advanced stat guy. Not because I disagree with the idea of quantifying players in this way, it’s just learning from observing is more of my forte. With that said, certain advanced stats are starting to grow on me.
For those of you old school guys like myself, I suggest checking out George’s game by game summary of the Rangers’ scoring chances. This season he added the type of chances tracked (i.e. rebound, transition rush, etc.), which I think will tell a much better story about our play as the season progresses.
Sean Avery = Jeremy Shockey Syndrome?
The adoration Sean Avery still received until the very end is something I like to call the Jeremy Shockey syndrome. It’s no secret sports fans love a bad-ass player, especially if they have some skill. Once that skill diminishes though, all you are usually left with are expensive ego problems, which inevitably cause headaches in the locker room.
Who else would fit this syndrome? Gary Sheffield anybody?
Lessons From South Park
I don’t know if I mentioned this here before, but I am a huge fan of South Park. They recently did this episode where Cartman and Randy use this “advanced metric” called TMI (a series of complex formulas vs. national averages) in order to prove that their penises aren’t small. Anyway, they fight over this formula and end up joining the “Pissed Off and Angry Party,” which is a collection of other angry dudes who wouldn’t you know it, are also missing a few inches.
So what the hell does this have to do with hockey?
All of this chest pounding with Don Cherry (and the wannabe machismos who follow him) angrily calling the new NHL soft, because players are no longer delivering hits to head, reminded me of the correlation South Park was trying to evoke.